A Redmond veteran’s biggest battle is over
It’s a tough time of the year for military families who can’t be with their loved ones. But for some families, it’s what happens after they do come home that can have devastating consequences.
“This was our last family portrait,” Redmond resident Erryn Fulton said recently, holding up a photo of smiling faces dressed in old-time outfits. “(My husband) was really looking forward to those Christmas dinners, where everyone hugged around the tree and ate stuffing and ham.”
It’s a holiday wish that won’t come true, at least not with the whole family.
This Christmas will be tough.
“I loved him and I miss him so much,” Fulton said tearfully. “I’m just trying to figure out what normal is, and how my kids are going to go on, because we’d planned this whole life together.”
Shawn Fulton, 39, was a husband, a father of six, a Redmond resident, and an Army veteran. He survived multiple tours overseas; his last deployment was to Iraq.
He spent at total of 15 years as a combat flight medic, but what he couldn’t survive was coming home.
“The war on his body and the war in his mind never left Iraq,” Fulton said.
Shawn Fulton committed suicide three months ago, the end of his longest battle yet.
Erryn Fulton said after her husband was medically discharged in 2009, each day for him was a struggle with physical pain, depression and post-traumatic stress disorder.
“Just being the flight medic took it’s toll, from what he saw and had to do, physically and mentally,” Fulton said.
Sadly, it’s all too common.The U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs reports 22 veterans commit suicide every day — that’s one death about every hour. By the time Christmas arrives, 374 more families will share the Fultons’ pain.
“I don’t sit there and go, ‘Wow, how dare he do this to me and my family?’ because I don’t think of it as a normal suicide — because I know how much pain he was in,” Fulton said.
But she does partially blame the VA.
“They would say, ‘Just take this, take this,’ Fulton said of all the medications her husband was prescribed. “The VA (mental health) programs couldn’t fit him in because he wasn’t just returning (from war), or hadn’t been a chronic sufferer. It was frustrating.”
But more than the anger is the sadness.
Erryn Fulton says it will be tough to watch the kids grow up without their dad — doing all the proms, the marriages as a single parent. She recently did one important milestone alone: their oldest son’s recent graduation from basic training.
“It’s bittersweet. I’m really proud of him,” Fulton said. “He decided to continue that path even after Shawn passed, because he really felt that would make his dad proud.”
And she prays their son can beat a soldier’s toughest battle.
“I do worry about the mental toll. I just hope his experience with the military is better,” Fulton said.
If you or anyone you know is in crisis, there are resources for help. You can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 24/7 at 1-800-273-TALK (8255). Deschutes County also has an emergency crisis line: 800-875-7364.
