‘Hold on to her’: Unsettling encounters in SE Bend raise alarms and awareness about human trafficking
BEND, Ore. (KTVZ) -- Multiple Bend mothers say routine trips to Southeast Bend shopping centers have recently taken a disturbing turn, after an unknown man approached them in parking lots and began talking about their young daughters being trafficked.
What began as casual, friendly comments allegedly escalated into statements about the girls being “very pretty” and likely to be trafficked, if their mothers did not “hold on to them.”
Bend resident and mother Lauren Henderson says the encounter left her shaken. “He kept getting closer to me, and he followed me all the way to my car,” she recalled, adding that he repeatedly told her that her daughter was very pretty and would be trafficked.
After more mothers came forward describing the same man, similar comments, and the same locations, they contacted law enforcement. The women say they were told that while the alleged behavior was unsettling and inappropriate, it did not meet the legal definition of a crime under current statutes.
Legal experts and advocates note that many worrying encounters fall into a gray area: concerning enough to report and document, but not always chargeable as harassment, stalking, or another specific offense. Advocates still encourage people to make a report so patterns can be tracked over time.
Anti-trafficking experts stress that trafficking is not the same as a sudden, stranger abduction in a parking lot. Cheryl Csiky, executive director of the Bend-based national nonprofit In Our Backyard -- and a survivor of child sex trafficking herself -- says most trafficking-related approaches do not look like a “grab and go” situation.
“Most approaches from a trafficker or someone who’s looking to exploit someone will be friendly,” Csiky said. “Traffickers have a goal to get to know their victim first, to understand what their needs are, because that’s what they want to exploit.” Real trafficking cases are more likely to involve grooming, isolation and secrecy over time than a single public encounter, she added.
Csiky says silence is one of the conditions that allows exploitation to continue in any community. She encourages parents and caregivers to trust their instincts when something feels off, even if they cannot fully explain why in the moment.
“We don’t have to always be polite. Staying silent is what traffickers want,” she said. “When traffickers know that a town, a family, a child understands what human trafficking is, they’re less likely to target that person for any victimization.” In Our Backyard promotes local education and “linking arms” among parents, schools, law enforcement and service providers as a key prevention strategy.
For Henderson, the encounter has reshaped how she moves through everyday routines like shopping and school drop-offs. “I have been locking my doors instantly as soon as we get into the car, more careful where I park… just so much more aware,” she said.
Advocates emphasize that awareness, education, and community connection are more effective than fear alone. They encourage families to learn the signs of grooming and exploitation, talk openly with children at age-appropriate levels, and reach out to local organizations when they see something that doesn’t feel right—so concern can turn into action, rather than panic.
