Little hashtag — #metoo — tackles big issue

One little hashtag is taking on a huge issue.

“I felt violated, I felt humiliated and I felt guilty,” Claire Benke of Redmond said Thursday. “I felt like it was my fault.”

She is one of the millions of people who are part of the #MeToo movement, identifying themselves on social media as having experienced sexual assault or harassment.

Benke was 17. She was in her first car with a male friend.

“He started begging me to have sex with him, and I said no,” she said. “He continued to beg, so I continued to say no. All of a sudden, he unzipped his pants and started masturbating in the front seat of my car.”

According to rainn.org, more than 300,000 people are sexually assaulted every year, which is one every 98 seconds — and only about a third of those will ever report it.

The #MeToo movement is showing how common stories like these are.

“If you’re a survivor maybe you have something in your past. Maybe you’ve never told anyone. Or maybe you’re telling them for the first time, and getting the community wide support is really important,” Janet Huerta, executive director of Saving Grace, said.

She said survivors often shoulder the blame.

“We naturally want to be able to control our environment. (We think) ‘What can I do different? What did I do wrong?'”

Benke felt that way, but she doesn’t anymore. We asked her what she would say to another woman in her situation.

“It is not your fault at all,” she said. “You did nothing wrong. It doesn’t matter what you were wearing, or if you chose to be alone with that young man.”

Both women are excited #MeToo is getting a dialogue going.

“It’s about time for the conversation to be out loud,” Huerta said.

Saving Grace is hosting a community conversation, and is available to help:

Let’s Talk About It: Where Do We Go From #MeToo?

5:30-7:30 pm

Wednesday, Nov. 1

Environmental Center

Saving Grace offers safety, hope, and healing to survivors of relationship abuse and sexual assault in Central Oregon through its emergency shelter, a 24-hour helpline, emergency transportation, safety planning, support groups, children’s advocacy, community education and more.

Learn more at www.saving-grace.org or get help by calling the 24-hour helpline at 541-389-7021.