After her brother suffered a brain injury in a bike crash, this Olympic BMX rider has a new perspective on what success means

(CNN) — BMX rider Saya Sakakibara is all too aware of the risks of her chosen profession.

Her brother sustained a traumatic brain injury while racing, and Sakakibara has had two severe concussions, the second of which made her seriously consider quitting.

The Australian was leading during one of the semifinals at the Tokyo Games in 2021, when a collision with another racer just before the finish line resulted in a “pretty bad concussion” that prematurely ended her Olympic debut.

“I remember waking up and just being in disbelief,” Sakakibara told CNN Sport.

A concussion happens after a “bump, blow, or jolt to the head” or “a hit to the body that causes the head and brain to move quickly back and forth,” according to guidance from the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Another concussion in June 2022 in the middle of her World Cup campaign pushed Sakakibara towards breaking point.

“When I was in Switzerland going through rehab, literally, I was like, ‘What’s the point? I’m going through so much pain right now and BMX has given me a lot of grief,’” said Sakakibara.

“I didn’t feel like it’s worth the risk of having another concussion.”

Despite admitting that fear plays a role while competing, Sakakibara, who is a two-time BMX World Cup winner, said the “feeling of unfinished business” persuaded her to carry on competing and that she “wouldn’t change anything” about her career.

“Everything I did led me to this point,” she added.

‘All I had to do was just come along for a ride’

Born in Australia in August 1999 to a Japanese mother and a British father, Sakakibara moved to Japan as a child.

She recalled riding bikes with her brother, as cycling on pump tracks — single-line trails — became part of their daily routine.

“I didn’t have a choice because my brother, Kai, was absolutely obsessed with riding bikes,” said Sakakibara. “Our parents were really supportive of that, and they bought me a bike, so I was tagging along every time.”

She joined her local BMX club when her family moved back to Australia in 2007 and quickly showed early promise.

Alongside multiple national, state championship wins and a sixth-place finish in her World Championships debut, Sakakibara placed second overall at the 2018 World Cup circuit.

Kai was also a promising BMX racer – he was 10th in the world rankings in February 2020, while Sakakibara was in the top five.

That same month, while both brother and sister were preparing for the Tokyo Games, the then 23-year-old Kai had to be put in a medically induced coma for two months after he fell during an opening round heat at a World Cup event in New South Wales, Australia.

A traumatic brain injury (TBI) that he sustained after losing balance and hitting his head into the track has impacted his ability to speak and move the right side of his body, and he had to learn key life skills from scratch. For 16 months, medical facilities became part of Kai’s daily pattern.

Since then, Sakakibara said, he has progressed “so quickly.” Kai is able to walk, and has found his passion for public speaking to raise awareness about TBI and inspire others; a complete turnaround from what brain specialists had predicted four years ago.

“Having [BMX racing] taken away, it was definitely hard for him to go through what he went through [with] the rehab,” said Sakakibara of her brother, who now aspires to represent Australia in rowing at the Los Angeles Paralympic Games in 2028.

“I was always following Kai. He just took care of everything and all I had to do was just come along for the ride. I didn’t even think about the threat he had on his life and how much his life is going to change in this moment.

“I learned a lot about myself – there’s so many things outside my control that happens. So many things that are unfair, and we just have to keep going, which is the tough part. Sometimes it doesn’t make sense, sometimes it feels like this is the worst thing that’s going to ever happen to us, but at some point, we actually are going to learn from it.”

Heartbreak in Tokyo

While on the international circuit without her brother around, Sakakibara had to contend with the realities of a BMX racing career by herself and said she “didn’t understand what she was doing” while cycling in an arena without Kai’s guidance.

The start of the Tokyo Games, Sakakibara said, was “a big mess,” as she finished last in her first race. She quickly bounced back at the end of day one, when she had the third-fastest lap of the quarterfinals.

Sakakibara earned enough points to go through to the semifinals, but the Australian then crashed mid-air with current world champion Alise Willoughby just before the finish line.

Although fifth and first place finishes in the first two runs were enough for the Australian to make it to the final day, she was not fit to compete as the crash left her badly concussed.

“I was leading the lap, but I was struggling a lot with my endurance to keep up to the finish line, so I knew that a lot of girls were catching up and my legs were just blown out by the time I got to the last corner,” she explained.

“Everyone was on edge, and it was an unfamiliar experience that it’s all kind of a blur at the moment.”

Post-concussion symptoms – prolonged headaches, fatigue and mood swings – and a struggle to accept the outcome of the race took a toll on Sakakibara’s mental health and her preparations for what proved to be an unsuccessful 2022 season.

“It was a tough period to come back from,” she said. “There was a lot of hype towards the Olympic Games. There was a lot that happened before with Kai, and there was a lot of emotion and purpose attached to this Olympic campaign that, since it ended in such a disappointing fashion, I didn’t know how to navigate and process properly.”

Another concussion almost a year after the crash in Tokyo left Sakakibara unable to enjoy racing.

She also worried that another concussion might be too much of a risk, so much so that she told her friends and family that she was done with BMX racing.

After deliberating for couple of months, however, she decided to continue.

“Physically I was there, I was fast enough, I was doing quite well, so all I needed to do was focus on my mental side,” Sakakibara said. “I gave it another go and that’s the push that I needed.”

‘I’ve grown so much as an athlete and as a person’

Subsequently Sakakibara won five out of 10 rounds throughout 2023 to become the World Cup champion for the first time and went back-to-back this year after winning four out of six races in a shorter campaign.

She finished eighth at the World Championships in May, though the 24-year-old said she was using that disappointment as motivation with the Olympics just around the corner.

Saakibara spends half a year in Paris, which could benefit the Australian coming into the Games. The Saint-Quentin-en-Yvelines Velodrome will be open for public use before the Olympics and the Australian joked that she “could ride every day” if she wanted to.

Expectations are high after what Sakakibara called “the most successful couple of seasons” of her career, but after the Games in 2021, she was more philosophical about competing at Paris.

“What I deem as a success at the Olympics is just walking away feeling like I did my best,” she said. “I did get wrapped up in all the hype in Tokyo, I was just winging out everywhere, and it was very overwhelming, very exciting.

“It’s only been three years, but I feel like I’ve grown so much as an athlete and as a person. I know that when the pressure is high, when I know what I’m doing, everything will follow, and I will be able to do my best performance.”

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